Connor Lacey's Adventures of My Little Pony The Movie/Transcript

This is the script for Connor Lacey's Adventures of My Little Pony The Movie.

[opening logos]


 * [Rachel Platten]
 * Hey! Hey! Hey!
 * Hey! Hey! Hey!
 * See the ponies trottin' down the street
 * Equestria is where they wanna meet
 * They all know where they wanna go
 * And they're trottin' in time
 * And they're trottin', yeah
 * They got the beat
 * They got the beat
 * They got the beat
 * Yeah, they got the beat
 * Go-go music really makes us dance
 * Do the pony, puts us in a trance
 * Do the watusi, just give us a chance
 * That's when we fall in line
 * 'Cause we got the beat
 * We got the beat
 * We got the beat
 * Yeah, we got it!

Spike: 'Scuse me! Dragon on the move! Important princess documents comin' through!

S04E26 Unnamed Earth Mare #1: Whoa! Everypony from Manehattan to Saddle Arabia is here! Apple Cobbler: I know, filly! We almost couldn't book a stable!

Clear Skies: Princess Twilight must have her hooves full with this giant Festival!

Female Pony 2: Are you kidding?! She's smart and organized and cool under pressure! There's nothing she can't handle!

Twilight Sparkle: Ommmmm... Ohhhhhhh mmmmy goodness, I can't handle this! Ooh! Nothing is working! I just have to get it together! Just go in there! And ask! This is your Friendship Festival! Everypony's happiness rests in your hooves. [facehoofs] Ohhhh!

Spike: Okay, Twilight. Got all your charts and graphs.

Twilight Sparkle: Oh, thank goodness you're here, Spike! I'm just so nervous about this meeting!

Spike: Whachoo talkin' 'bout?

Twilight Sparkle: [sighs] I'm about to ask the three most royal princesses of Equestria for a huge favor! What if they reject me?

Spike: It'll be fine. Just remember the most important thing.

Twilight Sparkle: Smile?!

Spike: Eh... no. You're a Princess, too.

Twilight Sparkle: Right! [exhales] Good morning, Princesses. Thank you all for seeing me. I have an idea that I think will make our Friendship Festival the most wonderful celebration Equestria has ever seen!

Princess Celestia: Yes, Twilight! We are very excited!

Princess Cadance: Ponies have been arriving from all over all morning.

Princess Luna: I'd like to think it's to see us, but Songbird Serenade might be the bigger attraction.

Twilight Sparkle: Yes, she is the... "mane" event! [giggles] And to make it extra special, I could use your help. Spike?

[whiteboard wheeling in]

Spike: [humming fanfare]

Twilight Sparkle: Songbird Serenade's performance is not scheduled to start until after you begin the sunset. And based on my precise calculation, to get the very best lighting for the stage, Princess Celestia, I was hoping you could make sure the sun stays about 28.1º to the south, and, Princess Luna, if you could raise the moon 62º to the north at the same time, it would reflect the sunlight on the other side and really frame the entire stage perfectly!

Princess Luna: I...

Twilight Sparkle: But wait! There's more! Cadance, if you could use your crystal magic to create an aurora above the stage, the sun and the moon will shine through it and create a truly amazing light show!

Spike: Presenting Songbird Serenade! Yeah, yeah, yeah! Whoa-ho! Whoa!

[bonk!]

Spike: [weakly] Ta-da...

Princess Luna: So you're saying you want us to move the sun and the moon for the party.

Twilight Sparkle: Well, I'd do it myself, except I don't have your magic. [snorts]

Princess Celestia: Twilight, each of us uses our powers to serve Equestria in our own way. You are the Princess of Friendship. You already have all the magic you need.

Twilight Sparkle: So... that'd be a no?

(Else where)

Damaras: Yes! We're in range of Canterlot, my lord.

Lord Zedd: Prepare to decloak. NOW!!

(Then the ships head toward Canterlot)

Sledge: After untold days, the Princess of Friendship and her friends shall pay for what they did to us villains!

Master Ville: Now it’s time for us to crush Canterlot... FLAT!!!

(Meanwhile, back at the party)

Connor Lacey: This festival’s gonna be so much fun.

Jeremy Belpois: Totally.

Rainbow Dash: [zooming] Sky's cleared and ready for the festival!

Rocky DeSantos: Whoohoo! Come one we're working!

Kimberly Hart: Easy, Rocky.

Tommy Oliver: Alright guys, we're almost ready for the festival!

Aisha Campbell: Whohoo!

Zhane: This festival is one of the biggest events in Equestria.

C.Y.T.R.O.: Observation: This festival is one of Equestria's traditional events.

Pinkie Pie: [blowing up a balloon]

[balloon squeaking]

[balloon deflating]

Pinkie Pie: Whoa!

Rayne Martinez: Look out! Balloon on the loose!

[birds whistling in harmony]

[balloon zooming by]

Pinkie Pie: Whoa! Heads up, Fluttershy! Out of control balloooooon!!

Fluttershy: Hoo. I don't think it's the balloon that's out of control, Pinkie Pie!

Applejack: Hey, y'all!

Tails: Hey, Applejack.

Pinkie Pie: [screams]

Applejack: Anypony up for some free samples of my family's apple cider?

Rainbow Dash: Ah! Thank you! Loved it!

Rarity: [humming]

Applejack: Wow, Rarity. It's a fine job you're doin' there. 'Course it might not get done 'til after the concert.

Rarity: Applejack, darling, anypony can do "fine". Twilight asked me, so clearly, she's going for fabulous, and fabulous takes time.

Rainbow Dash: Fabulous takes forever! But "awesome"...

[flies past]

Fluttershy: Whoa!

Rainbow Dash: ...can get done in four seconds flat! Faster if I do my sonic rainboom!

Rarity: Aah! Nono, oh no! Don't you dare, Rainbow Dash! It looks wretched enough already.

Rainbow Dash: Oh come on, it's fine!

Rarity: If you were raised in a barn! Ahem, no offense, Applejack.

Applejack: None taken. Especially since I wasn't raised in a barn. My family just happens to have a barn. Where I was born. And... spent most of my formative years...

Rainbow Dash: [very quickly] Raised in a barn!

Steel: Here comes Twilight now.

Twilight Sparkle: Okay, just two hundred and eighteen things left to do and we're ready.

The Irelanders, Rainbow Dash, Applejack, Fluttershy and Pinkie Pie: Hey, Twilight!

Rarity: Hello, Spike.

Spike: Uh, hi, Rarity. Heh heh.

Applejack: How'd it go with the other Princesses? They like your idea?

Pinkie Pie: I bet they loved it!

Twilight Sparkle: [sighs] Not exactly. They think I can make today perfect without their magic.

Connor Lacey: Sorry about that.

Rarity: And they are absolutely right, darling. This festival is your brilliant idea and we know you're up to the task!

Twilight Sparkle: But what if I'm not?! What if Songbird Serenade hates the stage?! Or nopony makes a new friend?! And if I fail at the festival, then who am I?!

Pinkie Pie: Twilight, look at me! This will be the biggest celebration Equestria has ever seen! As the Princess of Friendship, you cannot fail! This day will define who you are! The pressure is intense! It's almost too much for any single pony to handle! [screams]

[ponies gasp]

Pinkie Pie: But you have us! So stop worrying.

[clink!]

[magic whirs off]

[balloon pops]

Rainbow Dash: [burps]

Twilight Sparkle: Ah!
 * [Applejack]
 * It's time to show 'em what you've got
 * [Rarity]
 * It's time to go and get things done
 * [Fluttershy]
 * But you don't have to do it on your own
 * [Pinkie Pie]
 * 'Cause you've got friends right here to make it fun

[Mane Five]
 * We got this, you got this
 * We got this together

Twilight Sparkle: Huh?

Spike: Whoa!
 * [Rainbow Dash]
 * Sometimes the pressure gets you down
 * And the clouds are dark and grey
 * Just kick them off and let the sun shine through
 * And scary as it seems, more help is on the way
 * 'Cause friends have friends that wanna help out, too
 * [Rainbow Dash and Wonderbolts]
 * We got this, you got this
 * We got this together
 * [Crowd]
 * It's the Festival of Friendship
 * And we can get it done
 * A festival that they won't forget
 * A party to be proud of
 * A day of games and fun
 * Just you wait and see
 * A magic day in perfect harmony
 * [Fluttershy]
 * You got this
 * [Bird]
 * [whistles melody]
 * [Fluttershy and bird whistle]
 * We got this together
 * [Applejack]
 * With friends and family, you are never alone
 * If you need help, we've got your back
 * You can be honest, let your problems be known
 * [Applejack and Apple family]
 * 'Cause you got us to pick up the slack
 * We got this
 * [Big McIntosh]
 * Eeyup!
 * [Apple family]
 * We got this together
 * [Rarity]
 * Pay attention to the details
 * Every gem even-spaced
 * Make the colors perfect
 * [Spike]
 * Takin' one or two to taste
 * [Rarity]
 * Inside and out, beautiful throughout
 * Generosity is what we're all about
 * [Spike]
 * [mouthful] You got this
 * [Rarity]
 * You got this
 * [Rarity and Spike]
 * We got this together
 * [Twilight Sparkle]
 * Today needs to be perfect, it all comes down to me
 * I don't know if I'm ready
 * For all the things they need me to be
 * I am the Princess of Friendship
 * But that is more than just a crown
 * It's a promise to bring ponies together
 * And never let anypony down
 * [Pinkie Pie]
 * We've got an awful lot to bake
 * Each pony needs a piece of cake
 * Oh, wait! There's something better we can do
 * We're gonna need some more supplies
 * To make a really big surprise
 * She'll be so shocked—she's sure to love it, too!
 * You got this!
 * We got this together!
 * [All]
 * It's the Festival of Friendship
 * Together we are one
 * A day we will never forget
 * And now everything is ready
 * So when the day is done
 * [Rainbow Dash]
 * The weather
 * [Applejack]
 * The banquet
 * [Rarity]
 * The style
 * [Fluttershy]
 * And music
 * [All]
 * All will be in perfect harmony!

Twilight Sparkle: [gasps, yells, groans]

[ponies gasping]

Maxwell “Max” McGrath: Uh-oh.

Twilight Sparkle: Pinkie!

[splat!]

Pinkie Pie: Oopsie! Guess my easy bake confetti cake cannon needs a little bit more fine tuning!

William Furno: You think?

Twilight Sparkle: [nickers] Hmmm...

Code Red: Songbird Serenade? Is it really her? It is, it is!

Songbird Serenade: Hiya. I'm lookin' for the pony in charge?

[camera flashing]

Songbird Serenade: I need to set up for my sound check.

Twilight Sparkle: Ms. Songbird Serenade? Um, I was just going to check on you. [laughs nervously] I'm Princess Twilight, and sorry about the mess. I'm usually not so...

[ponies gasping]

Female pony: Oh! How embarrassing!

Songbird Serenade: Caked in cake?

Twilight Sparkle: Heh heh.

Vinny: You have visual on buttercream?

Whinnyfield: Visual confirmed. Go for cleanup.

Toa Matau: Well, this is gonna be the most Festival of Friendship ever!

Newton: I’ll say.

[thunder]

Zero: You guys hear that?

Twilight Sparkle: [gasps] Storm clouds? I ordered perfect weather! Rainbow Dash?!

Rainbow Dash: Uh... I... don't think those are storm clouds. [ominous music]

Pinkie Pie: Ooh! I bet those are the clowns I ordered!

[crumbling]

[balloons deflate]

Pinkie Pie: ...Or definitely not the clowns I ordered.

Espio the Chameleon: Must be an enemy ship.

Omega E-123: Enemy sighting confirmed.

Argos: You got that right, Irelander!

[balloon deflates]

[ponies gasp]

Party Favor: Brian, no!

Grubber: [breathing and grunting]

[microphone feedback]

Grubber: [clears throat, voice echoing] Ponieth of Equethtria, we come on behalf of the fearsome, the powerful, the almighty...Thtorm King!

[ponies cowering and whispering]

Female pony: This is terrible!

Grubber: And now, to deliver the evil, evil methage, put your hooveth together for Commander Tempeeeetht!

[sparking]

Rouge the Bat: That’s Tempest?

Princess Sofia: I guess so.

Twilight Sparkle: Is that a... unicorn?

Spike: I think so, but what happened to her horn?

Princess Celestia: "Tempest" is it? How may we help you?

Tempest Shadow: Oh, I'm so glad you asked. How about we start with your complete and total surrender?

Twilight Sparkle: Hi there. Princess of Friendship. Not exactly sure what's going on, but I know we can talk things out.

Tempest Shadow: Oh, goody. All four Princesses. Here's the deal, ladies. I need your magic. Give it up nicely, please, or we make it difficult for everyone!

Princess Luna: And why should we cower before you? There's one of you and hundreds of us.

Tempest Shadow: [chuckles] I was hoping you'd choose "difficult".

[storm creatures growl]

[airships hovering]

Twilight Sparkle: [gasps]

David Brennan: We’re under attack!

Princess Cadance: [gasps]

[storm creatures roar]

[ponies screaming]

Tempest Shadow: [grunts]

Princess Cadance: [grunts, screams]

Twilight Sparkle: [gasps]

Princess Celestia: Cadance!

Princess Cadance: [gasps] I can't... stop it!

Tempest Shadow: [grunts]

Princess Celestia: Luna, quick! Go south beyond the Badlands!

Princess Luna: Hmph!

Tempest Shadow: [grunts]

Princess Celestia: Seek help from the Queen of the Hippo— [screams]

Princess Luna: [gasps, grunts, yelps]

Twilight Sparkle: Luna!

Tempest Shadow: [chuckles]

Rainbow Dash: Twilight!

Tempest Shadow: [chuckles] Easy as pie.

Grubber: Oh, I love pie. Oh, you totally got the latht Printheth!

Tempest Shadow: That's not the Princess! Grubber, get her now!

Grubber: Guyth, we gotta get the Princess!

Lord Arcanon: Right!

[clatter]

Applejack: Over here, y'all!

Ulrich Stern: We’re almost out!

Twilight Sparkle: Come on!

Mane Six and the Irelanders: [panting]

Twilight Sparkle: [grunts]

[bridge crumbles]

Mane Six and the Irelanders: [scream]

[splash!]

Mane Six and the Irelanders: [gasp for air, scream]

[music grows intense]

[music becomes quieter]

Grubber: Which one of you guyth ith goin' down there?

[storm creatures growl]

Grubber: [sighs] I would, but I jutht had a hearty meal, and I will think and I will thide-cramp. I'm very big-boned. I think quick.

[water flowing]

Rarity: [catching her breath]

Applejack: Everypony okay?

Delphine: I’m okay.

David Brennan: So am I.

Alyssa Enrilé: Me two.

Rarity: I think my bottom's on backward.

Pinkie Pie: We just got our cupcakes handed to us by the worst party crasher ever!

Rainbow Dash: We gotta go back there and fight!

Ethan James: Are you crazy?

Spike: Well, you saw the size of those goons. You seriously wanna go back?

Applejack: So now what? We can't hide here forever. And let's be honest, we can't go back. Look at what they did to the Princesses. We gotta keep them from Twilight.

Connor Lacey: So what’s the plan?

Twilight Sparkle: The Queen.

Pinkie Pie: Yeah, the Queen! Uh, what queen?

Twilight Sparkle: Celestia told Luna to find the Queen of the... "Hippos". Luna can't, so I have to.

Rainbow Dash: Uh, hippos? Seriously?

Pinkie Pie: I've heard they're surprisingly graceful for their size. Huh, but they're always hungry.

Spike: Hungry?

Applejack: Hippos?

Twilight Sparkle: They're somewhere south, past the Badlands.

Fluttershy: That means we'll have to... leave Equestria. Oh!

Rayne Martinez: That’s right.

Rarity: I'm not even packed!

Twilight Sparkle: I understand you're scared, and nopony else has to go. But I have to find this queen. She might be our only hope.

[music]

Rainbow Dash: Well, you're not getting all the glory. We're in this together.

Applejack: We got your back.

Pinkie Pie: Indeedy!

Rarity: I am ready to save Equestria!

Fluttershy: Yay.

Spike: We're all behind you, Twilight.

Connor Lacey: All of us are.

Pinkie Pie: Let's go find this hippo!

Spike: Uh, south?

Pinkie Pie: Hehe! Whee! [giggles] Whee! Boingy-boingy-boingy-boingy-boingy! Anypony up for a game of "I Spy"?

All but Pinkie Pie: [groan]

Pinkie Pie: No, really! Come on! I spy with my little eye something that is orange. No takers? It's you, Applejack! [giggles]

Schuyler "Sky" Tate: That Pinkie.

[storm creatures grunting]

Tempest Shadow: All this power wasted on parties when there are far greater uses.

[ringtone]

Tempest Shadow: Well? Answer it!

[dial-up modem noises]

The Storm King: Where am I supposed to be looking? I never understand how this spell works. Tempest!

Tempest Shadow: Over here, Your Excellency.

The Storm King: Where?

Tempest Shadow: Over here.

The Storm King: Huh?

Tempest Shadow: No. No, right. Look right.

The Storm King: My right?

Tempest Shadow: Yep.

The Storm King: Oh. There you are. Here's the deal. I'm in the middle of a big re-brand here. "The Storm King" is tracking well as "intensely intimidating", but you know what? I need to back it up. You know what I need to back it up with? A storm! That would be great! You promised me magic that could control the elements, and right now, I'm holding a what? A branch. A twig. Bleh!

Tempest Shadow: Uh, that would be the Staff of Sacanas, Your Excellency, and it will...

The Storm King: Mm-hmm?

Tempest Shadow: ...channel the magic of the four rulers of this land.

The Storm King: Mm-hmmmm?

Tempest Shadow: You'll soon have the power of a hundred armies.

The Storm King: So that would be a yes on your locking down the four Pegacornicuseses, or whatever you call them?

Tempest Shadow: Give me three days. I'll have everything ready for your arrival.

The Storm King: [ominous] Remember, Tempest. Only I have the power to make you whole. Make this twig work, and you'll get your reward. Fail me, and your horn won't be the only thing that's broken.

Tempest Shadow: It won't be a problem.

The Storm King: [upbeat] Great! [warbling] I'm ready to power up, crash and bash, and be the biggest, baddest bugaloooooo...

[beat]

Grubber: Thorry, bad thpell thervice. You want me to call him back?

Tempest Shadow: Do you have the Princess?

Grubber: Well, uh, funny thtory. It kinda theemth like she... she might've like, you know, got away... a little bit. I know you're dithappointed, but I got one word for you: "thpongecake".

[zap]

Grubber: [screams]

Tempest Shadow: We need all four for the staff to work.

Grubber: Hey, I know! I want the Thtorm King to fix that crazy horn as badly as you do. It lookth like a crackly chipped tooth on the top of your head. And you know you don't look good in hatth.

Galvanax: That’s true.

Tempest Shadow: That Princess is not gonna keep me from getting my horn back! Prepare my ship!

Grubber: Ihhh!

Cyclonus (G1): Right away.

Tempest Shadow: Please. How far could one little pony get on her own?

[slide guitar sting]

Menasor (PWT): This is really hard to get to the kingdom of Hippos.

Piron: We should’ve been there hours ago.

Pinkie Pie: [panting] There's sand in my... everything... Heh... Saving... Equestria... [demented laugh] Oh! Look! Maybe this guy knows which way to go! What's that, friend? We're lost? [demented laugh, coughs, faints]

Rarity, Rainbow Dash and Spike: [panting]

Mirage (G1): This heat is intense.

Toby Tripp: It’s really hot.

Spike: We could be going in... circles! Endless... sand... [inhales] Nothin' for miles... but sand... [breathes] and this rock... [coughs] and this cactus... [breathes] and this roooooooooaaaaaad.... [breathes, faints, breathes] ...this rooooooad....

Twilight Sparkle: Hmm? A road? Where there's a road, there's a... [gasps]

Connor Lacey: A town.

Spike: Whoa!

Rainbow Dash: Cool!

Applejack: What is that?

Pinkie Pie: Oooh! A city! [scoffs] We are doing it, you guys!

Rarity: You know what they say: where there's a city, there's a spa!

Rainbow Dash: Who says that?

Applejack: 'Case you forgot, we're on a mission to save Equestria.

Rarity: I can multitask.

[bird squawking]

Pig Creature 1: Don't worry, little one, we'll let ya go!

Pig Creature 2: To the highest bidder!

Pig Creatures: [laugh]

Pig Creature 1: Nice!

[birds squawking]

Beachcomber: That's very cruel to those birds.

Seaspray (G1): You got that right.

Vendor 1: Storm King bobbleheads!

Vendor 2: Ooh. Hey! You with the horn, you selling?

Elsa the Snow Queen: She’s not interested.

Fluttershy: Oh...

[birds squawking loudly]

Fluttershy: Ooh!

Twilight Sparkle: Hi there! Ooh, I'm sorry. Here. Lemme help you with that.

Pushkin: Hey! No magic around my merchandise!

Mane Six: [scream]

Connor Lacey: That’s no way to speak to speak to my girlfriend— (stammering) my good friend.

Tosaru: That’s right.

Capper: Hmmm... Very interesting...

Twilight Sparkle: Okay. We just gotta stick together. Be careful who you talk to. And try to blend in.

The Irelanders: Right.

Pinkie Pie: Can I have your attention please?!

Twilight Sparkle: [groans]

Jessica Herleins and Noctis: Pinkie!

Pinkie Pie: Can anypony take us to the Queen of the Hippos?!

William Dunbar: That’s not blending in!

Mori: You want something? You gotta give something!

Pinkie Pie: Well, how about a big warm hug from a grateful pony friend?

[honk]

Pinkie Pie: How about this comb that I've never used? A picture of my sister Maud? This breath mint? Seriously, buddy. Help me help you.

Pig Creature 1: [belches]

Twilight Sparkle: Pinkie, you can't just take off! [through clenched teeth] And you don't need to announce to every...

Pinkie Pie: Relax, Twilight! I totally got this!

Louise: How much for the giant gecko?

Mane Six: Huh?

Spike: Who you callin' a gecko?

Twilight Sparkle: Uh, Spike isn't for sale.

Vera: I want that fancy purple hair! I'll give ya two storm bucks for it!

Rarity: Two storm bucks?! It's worth more than that!

Twilight Sparkle: Heh?

[various creatures bidding]

Deer Creature: Gimme that pink one!

Pig Creature 1: I'll take the blue one!

Pig Creature 2: No! I want the blue one!

Louise: I need that lizard!

Creature 1: I'll take that picture of your sister!

Deer Creature: I want all seven for my collection!

Toa Vakama: Is this what you call, “got this”?

Capper: Back up, everyone! Back it up! Y'all in some serious danger! Now you didn't touch any of them, did you? Just look at all those colors! You think that's natural? They're infected with "pastelis coloritis".

[creatures gasping]

Toa Lewa: Say what?

Applejack: Now, you listen here, fella, there ain't—

Capper: Don't worry, don't worry, as long as you're not covered in purple splotches, you'll be fine. Uh-oh.

Mori: [gasps] What do I do?!

Capper: Enjoy your last moments and don't touch anyone. Because parts will fall off.

Mori: [screams] Me parts!

Vera: [gasps]

Capper: Well, all right. [purrs]

Thomas the Tank Engine: That’s was close.

Rainbow Dash: You are awesome!

Capper: Mm-hm.

Rarity: And quite charming. [giggles]

Spike: Huh!

Capper: Capper's the name. Charming's my game. So... to the Hippos, then?

Pinkie Pie: [laughs]

Twilight Sparkle: I don't know if we should trust him.

Pinkie Pie: We could definitely use a friend out here!

Connor Lacey: Still I don’t know.

Capper: You know what? Little Cotton Candy Hair is right. And, if I do say so myself...


 * [Capper]
 * This town is not a nice place
 * For little fillies all alone
 * There are lots of twists and corners
 * That could lead to the unknown
 * Let me guide your way
 * And I'll be sure to help you through
 * You could really use a friend out here
 * And luckily for you...
 * I'm the friend that you need
 * When you're lost and don't know what to do
 * I'm your pal, your amigo
 * Useful and resourceful, too
 * And my help, you'll concede
 * Is a plus guaranteed
 * You can call and I'll come running
 * Just follow my lead
 * 'Cause I'm the friend you need!
 * [Earnest Klugetowner recolor]
 * He's a friend
 * Scaly Klugetowner: Quite a friend!
 * [Klugetowners]
 * He's a friend indeed!

[chomp]
 * [Capper]
 * You need a bud to spot the danger
 * A pal to stop the creep
 * A chum and not a stranger to assist
 * You need a bro who is cunning
 * That can help you take the leap
 * A friend who knows what's lying in the mist
 * Don't fear these darkened alleys
 * They're scary, yes, I know
 * Why, you could use a friend
 * To protect you wherever you go
 * And such a dazzling beauty
 * Covered in dirt and muck
 * But now your fate is changing
 * Now you are in luck
 * 'Cause I'm the friend that you need
 * When you're lost and don't know what to do I'm your pal, your amigo
 * Lookin' out for friends like you And my help, you'll concede
 * Is a plus guaranteed Just call and I'll come running We'll say it's agreed...
 * [to Needy] Here. Tell Verko, "My place, twenty minutes."
 * I've got something that will magically erase all my debt.
 * 'Cause I'm the friend you need!


 * [Applejack, Fluttershy, Pinkie Pie, and Rainbow Dash]
 * He's a friend


 * Rarity: Quite a friend!
 * [All heroes except Twilight Sparkle]
 * He's a friend indeed!

Capper: Welcome, my good heroes, to my little manor.

Rarity: Ooh! A sort of a roco-hobo-Bohemian hodgepodge.

Capper: Apologies for the state of my litter box. I wasn't expecting guests.

Pinkie Pie: Ooh! So many fun breakables!

Rainbow Dash: Whoa!

Applejack: [chuckles]

Capper: Y'all sure y'all want the Hippos?

Pinkie Pie: Yessirree! The Queen of the Hippos!

Capper: Not like the Queen of the Lions, or Tigers, or Bears?

Fluttershy: Oh, my!

Twilight Sparkle: Huh?

[storm creature grunting]

Vera: [screaming]

Toothy Klugetowner: Please! Please! I don't know anything! [screams]

Grubber: You really think the ponieth got thith far?

Tempest Shadow: [sniffs] Oh, they're here. Attention! A little purple pony passed this way. Tell me where she is...

Grubber: ...or thumpin real bad'th gonna happen. [squeaks]

Mori: You think we're gonna fall for this again? I don't know what kinda scam you're workin' with Capper and the rest of your friends, but--

Tempest Shadow: "Friends?"

Mori: Poison or no poison, you're gonna pay!

Tempest Shadow: [grunts]

Mori: [groans]

Grubber: Ohhhh, Fishman juth got dropped!

Tempest Shadow: Now...

Mori: Ihhhh...

Tempest Shadow: ...about this... "Capper"...

[horn charges up]

["The Girl from Ipanema" playing]

[Mane Six and Capper laughing]

Capper: Stop playin' me! A sonic rainboom? That's not a real thang! Is that a real thing?

Rainbow Dash: I'll show ya!

Capper: Naw-naw-naw, I don't need you sonic "rainbooming" up in my place, thank you very much. Whoa, hey, hold up now. Whoa.

Rarity: Here you go. I do apologize. If we were back home, I could've done something truly fabulous.

Capper: Okay... What's the catch?

Rarity: Nothing. After all that you've done for us, consider it a "thank you".

Capper: Oh. Uh, don't thank me. Really.

Twilight Sparkle: Guys! We've been looking for the wrong queen! We don't need the Queen of the Hippos! We need the Queen of the Hippogriffs! Part pony, part eagle!

Connor Lacey: Oh. That’s what Celestia almost Saadi.

Capper: Oh! Oh, the Hippogriffs! Now, the trouble with that is... no one knows... where they are...

Twilight Sparkle: Says here they're on the top of Mount Aris!

Pinkie Pie: You mean the mountain right outside the window?

Odd Della Robbia: That’s the one.

Capper: Objects in windows may be less mountainous than they appear. Heh heh heh...

Twilight Sparkle: Let's go, everypony.

Capper: [gasps] Wait! [cat yowl] You can't—you can't make it by y'allselves. You need an airship! And lucky for you, I can get you a ride.

Twilight Sparkle: I think we can get there on our own.

Connor Lacey: She’s right, you know.

[door opens]

Verko: Here's Verko! [laughs]

Twilight Sparkle: [gasps]

Verko: These ponies better shoot rainbow lasers out their eyes if they're gonna settle your debt! Brought the big cage. Let's load 'em up!

Mane Six: [gasp]

Rarity: You were... You were going to sell us?

Auriana: You snake!

Twilight Sparkle: I knew it! We gotta get outta here!

Connor Lacey: Right!

Tempest Shadow: [chuckles evilly] Twilight Sparkle: [gasps] Tempest Shadow: Silly little ponies. Twilight Sparkle: Tempest! Spike: [screams] Fluttershy: [squeaks] Tempest Shadow: [resumes chuckling] Trusting strangers? Big mistake. Big... Grubber: Huge! Verko: Hoo-hoo! My goodness! Well, look at you! With your scary broken horn and scowly eyes. What tricks do you know, my little pony-wony? [zap!] Verko: [weakly] Not bad... [faints] Twilight Sparkle: Go! Go! Tempest Shadow: Get her now! Grubber: You gonna be thcared now, ponieth! Mane Six: [panting] [storm creatures grunting] Mane Six: [screaming and grunting] [crash] Mane Six: [screaming] Applejack: I'm... gonna... be... sick! Mane Six: [screaming and panting] [crumbling] Twilight Sparkle: We have to get there! To the docks! Hurry! Rainbow Dash: [grunting] Applejack: That's it. Rarity: [yelps] Applejack: Don't look down now! Spike: [yells] Pinkie Pie: Yay! Spike: Dah! Pinkie Pie: Woo! [screams] Twilight Sparkle: Pinkie! Pinkie Pie: [screams] Twilight Sparkle: [pants, grunts] Pinkie Pie: Best... escape... plan... ever! Twilight Sparkle: WHAT?!?! Thwa! Spike: Shh! Boyle: Did you hear something? Squabble: [squawks] Boyle: Eh, probably just the rats. If we find 'em, we'll eat 'em. Rarity: Rats? [storm creatures growling] Capper: [grunts] Tempest Shadow: Now... where are they going? [horn charges up] Capper: Okay. No need for violence. Uh, they're headed... [button sparkles] [beat] Capper: They headed east! Yeah, to... to Black Skull Island. So, uh, glad I could be of service to His Majesty, the Storm King. I'll just be on my way. [yowls] Tempest Shadow: When I get my Princess. Until then, your fate is still... up in the air. Grubber: [laughs] Oh, you're gonna go in the thkiff! Which ith a boat! Thpethifically, a air-boat! [laughs] Capper: [yowls] Grubber: We make a great team. I love it how you thaid hith fate wuth "up in the air", and then I thaid, "you're gonna be in the air on an air-boat!" [ship horn blows] [ship bell clangs] Boyle: [belches and scratches] Rainbow Dash: Blugh! Applejack: Whadaya think, Twilight? Should we just... ask 'em to take us? Twilight Sparkle: Last time we trusted somepony, he tried to sell us! Mane Six: [gasp] Boyle: Hey, guys! Come check this out! Mullet: Looks like a pack of stowaways. Lix Spittle: What are we s'posed to do with 'em? Squabble: [squawks] Boyle: I think we tie 'em up! Applejack: [gasps] Lix Spittle: [squawks] We clip their wings! Rainbow Dash: [gasps] Mullet: Nah. We scar 'em... Rarity: [yelps] Mullet: ...emotionally! Fluttershy: [sobs] Mullet: Wai-wai-wai-wait. What say the book, Captain Celaeno? Captain Celaeno: Storm King's rule book says, "Throw them overboard." Mane Six: Huh? [parrots grunting] [union whistle blows] Captain Celaeno: All right! That's lunch! [splut] Twilight Sparkle: What? [munching] Rainbow Dash: Whoa whoa whoa! So you were about to toss us overboard and you stopped for a lunch break? Boyle: Storm King only allows one break a day for meals, then it's back to hauling goods. Spike: So you're delivery guys? Captain Celaeno: And gals. These uniforms aren't exactly doing us any favors. Twilight Sparkle: Then can you deliver us to Mount Aris? Captain Celaeno: Sorry. We do what the Storm King orders or we suffer his wrath. Twilight Sparkle: Right. Still going overboard. Lix Spittle: Eh, it's nothing personal. Pudding? Rarity: There's pudding? [splut] Rarity: Oh. Rainbow Dash: You weren't always delivery birds, were you? What about before the Storm King?

Captain Celaeno: Yeah. We used to be much more adventurous.

Pinkie Pie: Ooh! I met that guy in the desert!

Rainbow Dash: Whoa! You used to be pirates?!

Mullet: Um, we prefer the term "swashbuckling treasure hunters".

Rainbow Dash: So... pirates.

Squabble: [squawks]

Rainbow Dash: You birds have a choice to make. You could let some cloven-hoofed Storm King tell you how to live your lives, or...

[whoosh]

Rainbow Dash: ...you could be awesome again!